Tag: Relationship blog

You Deserve The Kind Of Love You Give Out

Love is not worthy of its name if it’s unrequited. A healthy relationship is a relationship built on love.

Love is a mutual thing never a one sided thing. Love is not about just giving, it also involves receiving.

Believe me you deserve the kind of love and care you give out to others.

Relationship is something to be enjoy not endure and it can only be enjoy if the feelings are mutual and the effort is mutually invested.

Here are the kind of partners you should be with if you want to enjoy a healthy and loving relationship:

 
1. You deserve someone that feels lucky to have you.

 
2. You deserve someone that respect and appreciate every little thing you do for them.

 
3. You deserve someone that will love and care about you, you don’t have to be the only one doing the loving and caring.

 
4. You deserve someone who is willing to put in the effort to make what you share last forever.

 
5. You deserve someone who will stay committed, faithful and loyal to you.

 
6. You deserve someone that respect you and make it clear to his friends and family that they must do same.

 
7. You deserve someone who will never get tired of you.

 
8. You deserve someone who believe in you and your dreams, aspiration and ambition.

 
9. You deserve someone who is committed to supporting you to achieve your dreams and goals.

 
10. You deserve someone who support and encourage you to be a better person in all ramification.

Relationship is best/sweet when the love, care, sacrifice, commitment, faithfulness, attention and efforts in general is coming from both end… Wish you happiness and love in your relationship pursuit.

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Don’t Marry A Man/Woman With These Behaviour: 4 Red Flag Signs You Must Not Overlook In A Relationship.

Relationship and marriage failure don’t just happen overnight. Relationships and marriages don’t turn violent, abusive and unhealthy all of a sudden. There are signs at the beginning that we often ignore because we chose to be blinded by our emotion or we are hopeful that things will just get better without addressing them. At the initial stage of the relationship people usually try as much as possible to be sweet and hide their true character. However, character they say is like a smoke which cannot be hidden forever- it always reveal itself.

One important thing to do at the beginning of a relationship is to pay close attention to the character/behaviour of your partner before you get too deeply attached to him/her emotionally.

You must never let your emotion get the best of you in the face of potential danger.

Don’t let your emotion do the thinking for you.

Don’t get too desperate to be in a relationship just because you are tired of being single.

Most abusive relationship could have been totally avoided at the beginning before getting deeply involved if only the persons involved had pay attention to red flag signs you must not ignore in a relationship before it get too serious.

Here are the red flag signs you must watch out for if you dont want to end up in a violent or abusive relationship/marriage:

1. Aggressiveness: I saw a video on twitter about a lady who was beaten black and blue by her ex just because she left him. In the video, she said she didn’t believe she could survived the violent attack. I must say she is lucky because most victims of aggressive and violent partners don’t live to tell their bitter story.

We can tell if someone is overly aggressive in a relationship but oftentimes we make excuses for their aggressive actions towards us because we have become emotionally attached to them.

If he hits you at will when you are still dating just imagine how often he will use you as a punchbag over little misunderstanding when you are both married.

Some ladies make a mistake of perceiving aggression as manliness.

If you think he will use his aggression to protect you, think twice because you will surely become a victim of it one day.

Aggressiveness is not only a male gender thing, it applies to the female too.

There are women physically abusing their husband or even ending their hubby life.

If she throws object at you or uses dangerous objects to threaten you during a misunderstanding, you should know that you are not safe in such a relationship.

Aggressiveness is a red flag sign that most people usually overlook when they allow their emotion to overrule their judgement.

The sad news is most people that make this grievous mistake don’t live to tell their story while few that survived abusive relationship with an aggressive partner carries with them a fearsome memory and an indellible scar they will not forget for the rest of their lives.

So be careful before you decide to ignore this red flag sign.

2. Irresponsible behaviour: Most people focus too much on physical looks and financial status before considering a prospective partner. That in itself is not a bad idea if only the important things are not trivialize or ignored completely.

The important thing to look out for when it comes to chosing a partner is the person’s behaviour/character.

This is because it is the behaviour of the person that will determine how they will treat you or conduct theirself in the relationship.

If you are planning to get married to someone, it is important for you to be sure he/she doesn’t have a behaviour that will frustrate and jeopardize the success of nuptial conjugation in the nearest future.

We have heard lot of stories of irresponsible partners leading to high rise in divorce rate in our generation. Some are stories of married men neglecting their marital responsibility while chasing single ladies in town. Or men neglecting their pregnant wife. Women are not left out. Stories of married women leaving their children and husband for a richer guy is also all over the place.

You must be sure if he/she is a responsible person. That’s someone that wouldn’t neglect his/her marital responsibily and daring the consequences.

3. Promiscuity: Staying faithful and loyal is a personal choice which require self control. Faithfulness and loyalty are very important for the success of any relationship/marriage.

However, some people are not willing to deny their body of any sexual pleasure.

They lack the self control/discipline require to stay faithful to one sexual partner. They allow their sexual urges dictate their action at the expenses of their relationship.

People like these often says everyone cheat.

You must stay away from people like these if you know you can’t handle seeing your partner sleeping around when you are married.

If he/she does it during dating/courtship period, chances are high he/she will continue to do it when you eventually get married.

Some people see promiscuity as a normal way of life.

They believe everyone cheats and it is impossible to stay faithful to one sexual partner for a long time.

These are lies promiscuous person or cheater use to justify their abnormal behaviour.

Cheating is not normal in a relationship. Cheating is not a mistake but a choice.

It indicates lack of self control over sexual urges.

It shows that the person don’t really care about hurting their partner’s feelings.

Men and women cheat.

Not all men cheat and same can be said for women.

Don’t make a mistake of settling for a promiscuous partner just because people are saying everyone cheat.

Not everyone cheat. There are still people(men and women) who don’t cheat.

4. Manipulative behaviour: This is the last red flag sign you should watch out for in a relationship before you consider take it to another level -marriage.

Some people are expert at manipulating people.

They don’t enter into a relationship because they are in love, they only enter when they have find someone they can manipulate and take undue advantage of financially or in other area base on their need.

What they do is to use people to further their own selfish cause.

They will blackmail you emotionally or bully/threaten you just to get what they want in the relationship.

Partner like this will want you to do everything for them as if you are oblige to.

If you fail to do what they ask of you, they will throw tantrum at you like kids do.

They will pick up a fight with you or say stuff that will make you feel guilty.

Be careful of emotional manipulators.

Pay attention to the red flag signs discussed so as not to regret your decision later in the future concerning your choice of partner like most married people are regretting.

Don’t Stay In An Abusive/Unhealthy Relationship: Relationship Is Not A Do Or Die Affair

Relationship is not a do or die affair.

Relationship should not be rush into just because you dread the feeling of being lonely.

Being single doesn’t mean your life is miserable.

So don’t enter into a relationship because you are lonely. You shouldn’t allow loneliness push you into unhealthy or toxic relationship.

Why would you stay in a relationship that bring continuous sorrow and pain to you, when there is someone out there who will cherish you and go the extra mile just to ensure you are happy.

Life is too short why would you decide to spend most of it in sadness and sorrow all in a name of relationship.

Our relationship determines to a great extent if we are going to enjoy our life on earth or not.

Though no relationship is perfect but a healthy relationship will not derail your life or career and bring you continuous sorrow, pain and sleepless night.

A person that truly loves you will always be careful not to hurt your feelings and make concerted effort to make you a happier and better person than you can be without him/her.

Relationship is not all about money.

Relationship is not all about catching feelings.

Relationship is not all about physical attraction.

You must learn to develop your emotional intelligence so as to prevent your emotions from controlling your life and causing you to make wrong choice when it comes to chosing a partner.

You must not allow your emotion to always determine the direction of your life and relationship.

Stop desiring or longing for someone who take you for granted just because he/she looks great or support you financially.

Stop longing for someone who you have to fight for his/her attention and affection just you find it difficult to stop thinking about him/her.

Stop falling in love with the same kind of people that keep using and dumping you.

Stop falling in love with people that make you feel inadequate and hard to love.

You need to displine and guide your heart.

Guide your heart with all dilligent for out of it flows the decision that will make or mar you in life and relationship.

Only give your heart to someone that will value and take good care of it.

Stop chasing people that you need to convince before they notice your worth and uniqueness.

Quit worrying about someone who does not have time for you.

You don’t need to beg for attention and affection from a person that loves and values you.

Learn to let go of any person or relationship that continuously cause you pain/hurt your feelings.

Any relationship that take away your happiness, peace of mind and sound night sleep is too expensive, let it go.

You must learn to know when to keep fighting for your relationship and when to give up on a dead relationship.

Love yourself enough to settle for someone that makes you happy and better.

You must also know that there is a difference between fighting for love and fighting for someone to love you.

Real and true love is never complicated, the moment things is getting complicated that is the best time to walk away.

Complicated relationship is nothing but time waster and joy killer.

Decide to always be with someone that cherish and appreciates you.

Decide to either be in a healthy relationship or be alone.

The Right Mindset Towards Misunderstanding In A Relationship

Misunderstanding is a normal occurence between partners due to differences in personality, temperament, upbringing, exposure and many other factors.

Misunderstanding come and go, and it should never affect your loyalty to your partner.

Having a misunderstanding with your partner is not a genuine excuse to start giving undue attention to other men or women.

If you value your relationship, whenever there is a misunderstanding your thinking should be focus on resolving the issue and at the same time availing it to understand your partner better.

Let your loyalty to your partner be rigid not flexible.

Be loyal to your partner till the relationship is over.

Loyalty brings untold respect and admiration. It is immaturity to flirt with the opposite sex in the presence of your partner.

Stop trying to make your partner feel jealous by flirting with the opposite sex especially when there is a misunderstanding between the two of you.

When you do that you are actually taking undue advantage of your partner’s emotion just because you know he/she loves you dearly.

If care is not taken that might destroy the relationship.

Whenever there is an issue in your relationship you must learn to face it heads on.

This is the only way to find a lasting solution to any problem that may arise in your relationship.

Doing otherwise is usually counter-productive.

Ignoring a problem don’t make it go away, it only make it get worse/bigger.

It is also immaturity to keep malice with your partner no matter the situation.

Don’t keep whatever is hurting you in your relationship to yourself. Speak out.

Don’t be bullied or threaten or blackmail to silence/submission in your relationship.

If you and your partner can’t learn to manage your issues and misunderstanding peacefully and live with each other happily in spite of them, then it is pointless to continue to remain in such a relationship.
When there is an issue in your relationship, find a way to resolve it amicably and continue loving each other.

If the problem is beyond remedy, it is better to go your separate way than to continue to remain together but embitter towards each other. This is because bitterness can make people do unreasonable things to the person they claimed to love.

Naturally love forgives and forgets wrongdoing.

However, if the offence is too much for your heart to forgive and mind to forget it is better to walk out of the relationship.

It is unlawful and immaturity to think of hurting or harming your partner irrespective of what they did wrong.

I have heard too many stories of man/woman murdering their partner.

The question i keep asking myself is “for what reason?”.

Why would you want to put yourself in a situation where you might end up spending the rest of your life in jail over something that is totally preventable.

Relationship is not a do or die affair.

If it is not making you happier and adding value to your life then it is not worth losing your sleep and peace of mind over.

If it is not working, it is okay to let it go.

Though it is advisable to give it your best shots before calling it quit.

It is important to know when to keep trying and when to walk away in a relationship.

Adopt the right mindset towards misunderstanding in a relationship.

Don’t ignore any issue bothering your mind.

If you don’t tackle it, it wouldn’t go away by itself. It will continue to hunt and hurt you until you face it and say enough is enough.

Learn to forgive your partner wholeheartedly.

Don’t keep record of your partner’s wrongdoing.

Don’t keep malice with your partner.

Don’t go to bed with anger and bitterness in your heart against your partner.

When you feel offended let your partner know by talking about it, don’t assume he/she should know.

Don’t give up on your relationship over little quarrel or misunderstanding.
Finally, if it is not working, you are free to walk out of it. Remember, it is a free world.

Never get violent against your partner.

You can never predict what a single violent act can result to in an agitated situation.

A single violent act can put you behind bars for the rest of your life.

It is always better to walk away.

Lets say NO to domestic violence in marriages.

Say NO to unhealthy or toxic relationship as a single.

Signs That Will Tell If He/She Is Your Soulmate: 10 Habits Of A Soulmate

A Soulmate is a person that loves you truly and have decided to stick with you through thick and thin.

Relationship is sweeter and animated when you find your soulmate.

Most people have found their soulmate but unknowingly let him/her go because they have unrealistic idea of a soulmate.

A soulmate is a human just like you.

Imperfect and mundane just like you.

But if you observe your relationship with them, you will notice that there is something unique about them.

They might not have answers to all your problems but they are willing to find the answers with you.

They complete and compliment you.

They love you the way you have never been love before.

They bring you comfort, peace of mind and happiness.

They encourage you to launch out and be your best possible.

They simply bring something new to your life.

So how will you know if he/she is your soulmate?

Here are signs that will help you know if he/she is your soulmate.

The 10 habits of a soulmate……

 

1. He/she makes you happy: Happiness is a personal decision. It must stem from within. Truth must be told, people in our lives also contribute largely to our happiness or sadness. Your partner have great influence on your mood.

Their actions/words can either make you happy or sad. A soulmate will make deliberate effort to ensure you are happy always and will never feel unconcern when you are sad.

 

2. He/she listens to you: Everyone is occupied by his/her own problem no matter how small it is.

Everyone is busy with their lives.

Most people don’t take time to listen to others to know exactly what they are passing through when something sensitive is been discuss with them.

A soulmate will never be too busy to listen to you.

He/she will eagerly put aside every other thing they are doing just to listen to you no matter what you have to say.

This is because he/she genuinely care about what you have to say and desire to know what you are going through.

A soulmate listen to understand not to jump to conclusion or judge you.

 

3. He/she challenges you: A soulmate knows your potential through constant interraction with you this make them to push and challenge to reach your full potential.

He/she finds joy in you achieving more and becoming your best possible.

He/she will never allow you to settle for mediocrity in whatever you set out to do.

A soulmate simply bring out the best in you.

 

4. He/she encourages you: Relationship is suppose to give us an assurance that no matter what happens even if the whole world go against us, there will always be one person to support and encourage us- our partner.

That is exactly what soulmate does.

A soulmate will always be your number one cheerleader.

 

5. He/she accept you: A soulmate will accept you for who you are without making you feel inadequate in anyway whatsoever.

A soulmate will love and accept you unconditionally, flaws and all.

 

6. He/she will never desert you: A soulmate is not someone that stays with you only when things are easy and rosy.

A soulmate will stay with you through thin and thick.

He/she will not desert you just because you are passing through a difficult times.

Instead of deserting you, a soulmate will stick around and help you overcome your challenges and difficulties.

 

7. He/she cherish you: To cherish is to love dearly. A soulmate will cherish you and appreciate your presence in his/her life.

What you cherish, you can’t take for granted. A soulmate will never take you for granted no matter how long you have been together.

He/she will instead cherish you more as the years goes by.

A soulmate will not get tired of you or lose respect for you just because you have been together for long. A soulmate will never stop loving you even when he/she is mad at you.

And he/she can not stay mad at you for long.

 

8. He/she finds it easy to appease you: A soulmate will value your happiness and peace of mind.

He/she understands that his/her actions can affects you directly or indirectly hence they are careful not to do things that will hurt your feelings.

Whenever he/she mistakenly hurt your feelings he/she will not find it difficult to say sorry to you.

He/she understand that apologizing when you are wrong is maturity and evidence that you value your partner’s feelings.

A soulmate doesn’t place his ego above his/her relationship or partner’s happiness.

A soulmate will gladly appease you when you angry or unhappy irrespective of who is at fault just to make sure you are happy.

 

9. He/she makes you feel comfortable: A soulmate will ensure you are comfortable around him/her so you don’t see the need to pretend.

A soulmate encourages you to express your true self. He/she will make you feel at ease when you around him/her.

A soulmate will not condemn or look down on you based on your personality type.

 

10. He/she correct and teach you: These days lots of people find joy in criticizing, mocking and judging people publicly when they make mistakes.

Very few people constructively correct and teach. Correction and teaching are acts of love.

A soulmate will correct/teach you so that you can improve in any area you are lagging behind.

A soulmate will not make an open mockery of you no matter your mistakes because he/she understands that shame to one is shame to both partners in a relationship.

Though a soulmate will not support you to indulge in a destructive habits.

A soulmate help you to desist from bad habits that can destroy your life.

He/she assist you to become a better woman or man.

A soulmate will not pressurize you to indulge in bad habits.
Everyone desire a relationship with a touch of paradise. A soulmate will give you that.

A soulmate will bring out the best in you. He/she will encourage and challenge you to be a better person. He/she will bring happiness to your life not sorrow and pain.

A soulmate is not a perfect person but someone committed to adding value to their partner’s life and making sure what they share last forever.

A soulmate is unforgetable, indispensable and irreplaceable.

Are you connected to your spouse on soul level ?

Are you your spouse soulmate?

If you can’t boldly answer yes. Here is your opportunity to improve your relationship.

Practise these 10 habits to be able to connect on a soul level with your partner and become a better partner to your spouse which will ultimately make your relationship a better one -paradise on earth.

Faithfulness Is Romantic, Sweet And Safe

Faithfulness to one partner is not boring contrary to popular opinion among cheats or unfaithful partners.

A scholar once said we are pluralistic in nature, hence the reason most people find it difficult to remain faithful to one partner.

This might not be completely true but to a certain degree it is the truth for some people because they have never been completely faithful to a single partner since they have venture into the world of relationship.

I will be honest with you, we are humans, imperfect being. We goof often.

We are constantly striving to maintain a balance between two forces (Good and bad forces) pulling us towards theirselves.

Hence, the numerous temptation we face as human.

However, facing numerous temptation is not a justification to do what is not right.

It is important to stress that as a human we are also equiped with the capacity and strong-will to chose to do the right thing inspite of mounting temptation.

A matured person understands that to every action there is equal and opposite reaction.

In other words, every single action carries a consequence.

A matured person often consider the consequence of his/her action before making decision to either take it or not.

Relationship and marriages are meant for matured people.

My advice for any person who is searching for a partner for serious relationship or marriage is that you should make maturity as your number one criterion.

It is important state that age is not synonymous with maturity.

A matured person understands that once you are in a relationship your action will affect your partner either positively or negatively.

This knowledge should influence our decision in relationship.

Relationship has to do with put your partner’s feeling into consideration before doing anything that will directly or indirectly affect him/her.

A matured man will stay faithful to a single woman.

A real man understands that his manliness is not measure by the number of women he keeps as his sexual partners.

A matured woman will also stay faithful to one man.

A real woman doesn’t share her body with numerous men.

Her sense of importance, attractiveness and class are not dependent on the number of men she keeps or sleep with.

Relationship is sweet when there is love.

Love is sweet and waxes stronger day by day when there is trust.

Guess what, honesty and faithfulness beget and retain trust. If you want to enjoy your life and relationship find someone you love and be faithful to him/her.

Then begin to build a great life and relationship together as a team.

Faithfulness is number one quality most people desire in a partner.

Don’t demand what you can’t give. If you want a faithful partner, you must be determine to be one yourself.

Faithfulness is never boring.

Faithfulness is sweet, romantic and possible though it require self control and discipline.

Faithfulness helps protect you from contacting sexually transmitted diseases.

Lastly, sex get better and sweeter with the same partner with time not boring.

So let go of the myth that claim you will get bored, tired or satiated when you keep having sex with the same person for a long period.

It’s a lie.

Faithfulness to one partner in a relationship and marriage is not boring and impossible.

It is possible with determination and self control.

It is sweet and romantic in the sense that it helps you to concentrate your attention and affection on your partner alone which will help you know each other better and be able to build stronger bond necessary to keep aflame the fire of love and romance in the relationship.

It also enhance peace of mind.

Staying faithful to your partner is one of the best decision you will ever make in life. Thank you

Love Knows No Boundary

Love is beautiful, ethereal and divine.

It has no boundary.

Love is not dependent on race, colour, religion or ethnicity.

Where there is love age, distance, weight and height are just numbers.

Love supercedes religion and ethnicity.

Love don’t wait for permission before it happens.

We don’t find love, love finds us.

Never let go of love because of differences in religion, tribe, educational status, financial status, social class or race.

Let love always lead the way.

Love doesn’t harm.

It doesn’t manipulate or take undue advantage.

It is not selfish.

Love abides till death separate.

Love is never one sided.

Love don’t just take, it also give back.

Love is the essense of life.

Love make everyone of us come alive.

Love breeds trust.

Love gives hope, joy and untold happiness.

Love is life.

Life is meaningless and boring without love.

Love is our soft spot.

Love is never a weakness but strength.

Love is not for the feeble minded.

It takes courage to fall in love and give your heart away to a stranger without the certainty that it will not be broken into pieces.

Love accentuate our humanity.

Love bring out the best in us.

Love is tender, caring, understanding, accommodating and forgiving.

Love is medicinal to the heart that carries it.

Without love humanity is bound for self destruction.

Don’t ever hate love or doubt its existence.

Don’t ever give up on love.

If you are yet to find love, keep searching it will find you soon.

If you have found love, cherish it and never take it for granted or let go.

Love is beautiful and it will make your life bright and beautiful.

Don’t fall in love with the wrong person.

A person that will abuse, manipulate or mistreat you.

Watch out for the character of your potential partner because it matters in the long run.

Make sure you wait for the right person. A person that will cherish, value and celebrate you.